Knp jadi MARAH? Knp BT liat pa yg terpampang di layar (ni jelas bukan soal trading…)? Knp g malah terdiam n ga mikir…”sapa seh g!” , “apa yg g mo..” , even I shut myself and consider that this’s what supposed to happen from the very beginning… or else WAR!
Ketika wkt sujud datang, ingin rasanya menumpahkan buncahan yg tersangkut di tenggorokan, well… I believe now, there’s something WRONG with ME! My immortal is taking me down and am quite welcome to it… such pain that I grace to cover my own feeling – hey… besides, I shouldn’t – from the 1st place – be standing in between
Sekali lagi sayap ku sudah patah… padahal blom lagi terbang ato mendekati terik matahari, like superman would say “so hard to be me..”. Sometimes I thank God for not letting ANYONE know how vulnerable I’d be… all they’d accept how I could smash myself and fly with no return – am only HUMAN, though… and it’s not easy.
Ketika waktu sujud tu datang dan lengkaplah senandung di sesaknya dada, yg hampir bisa kubayangkan adalah kebahagiaan – satu yg ga mungkin g rampas karena hanya dapat diciptakan. God would never hurt me – the one that he loves, he colors all the vision in my heart and I constantly ignore even misinterpret (forgive me, my dear God!). I can see the vision, the hope, the path that’s given (dan g cm panjang tangan dari kasih-Nya pada dunia… pekerjaan ni bikin g stress jg ya, mpe kadang2 sulit bt ngebedain antara harus ketawa ato nangis! Ato g nya jay g terlalu arrogant and selfish) and once the happiness comes – I ought to walk away.
No matter how, am still here… menunggu adalah satu kekejaman dunia, kekhawatiran tu seakan mencoba mencari celah tuk bisa menikam g mpe mati selamnya. Tapi sayangnya, cinta yg kau berikan, sang Khalik, mengangkat g jauh bahkan dari jangkauan yg lain karena entah betapa g menikmati rengkuhan-Mu ataukah g terlalu was2 akan terjatuh dan sakit. Bisakah g minta, that I am still here and u’d never change to stay?
Senandung nama-Mu akan datang lagi dan waktu kian bergulir, can u kiss the pain away or else just take my heart out of my body? I cant stop yhis damn tears… alone in my room, sucking my wounds…guess, Mr. Superman is out of reach that he could not hear me calling – “Somebody save me… I don’t care how u do… just save me… come on, I’ve been waiting for u… break right thru – I made this whole world shine for u… just save me, am still waiting for you!”
Lalu asa tu pun berlalu, seiring dengan meredanya badai dan berangkatnya kembali layar yg terkembang – hampir sempurna. Waktu sujud kembali memanggil, g cm bisa berkumandang dalam do’a dan bersimpuh meninta pengertian – lagi2, mudah2an sang Pencipta tiada bosannya.
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